I'm back to thinking about pushing for a resolution to this again (aka divorce). My mind swings pretty wildly lately. I am just not seeing enough positive signs. We don't talk, I don't see her... what is the point of continuing like this? I have no idea where her head is at. I want to ask her, but I can't. I have not heard from her since her texts two weeks ago. Even if we were to try to build a new marriage, I feel like I would always be waiting for her to do this again. I don't think I would ever be comfortable in that relationship. She has decided time and time again that I am not right for her... maybe I should just trust those decisions.
I feel like it has been a long time since BD and she should know what she wants by now. She knows 100% what it is like to live without me. So why does she not push for divorce??... I don't understand. I would prefer it at this point. I just don't know what to do. I have been doing nothing for a long time. In a lot of ways, I want this all behind me.
Sorry for the rant... I am frustrated by this lately. Maybe I should sign up for a coaching session... I'll think about it.
