Being light, breezy, mysterious, full of PMA, and moving moves you back to the central you, who is an attractive, beautiful woman that deserves time and attention.
Were you a mopey, blubbering mess when you started dating your husband? Is that what attracted him to you? What did?
I was strong, confident(almost cocky), and always KNEW I didnt need a guy to make me happy which is why I was always turning people down to date.I had goals and ambitions. When we first started dating I would tell him, Im sorry but you have to work for this. I'm never going to date you so you might as well give up. He tells everyong the b* in me made him want me. I kinda turned into a soft ball of mush after my kids though haha I did a full 180 from my old self. Now I have to 180 back to strong, sexy, confident me.
Today has been HARD but EASY.
Hard part: He was at my house when I got here. I decided that I'm going to treat my house as if he just lived here like separated but living together type situation because he seems to spend half or more of his time here and we do share the house when he has the kids I leave, and when I have the kids he leaves, and some days like today he shows up and will be here 24 hrs or more. Its so weird.
Easy: Boundaries surprisingly. I walked in, got some water, grabbed some laundry to fold and went to my room. After a while he came to lay on our bed and I ignored him. He just stared at me while I was in STFU mode. I'M A HUGE TALKER. Everyone says I talk to much..my whole family. My friends. Everyone lol. So that was a 180 from me. He left the room then came back and asked me about my classes I'm taking on monday. I was polite and answered his questions with a smile.
Him: So you class starts monday or was it tuesday?
DB Me: Yes, it starts monday.* keep folding clothes*
Old me: yes it starts monday at 9-12, it is suppose to be 9-1 but because D5 is in prek they let me switch my hours and then I can make up the time later it is at x address and I have to make sure I wear closed toed shoes and it is from monday- thursday. And then next wednesday my mom will watch S3 so I can make up my hours for school. I should be able to get x to watch s3 on monday and y to watch him wednesday and z to watch him thursday and the class costs x amount and then I need to do a,b,c after that to get my state license and then I plan to apply here, here,and here. Blah blah blah blah..10 minutes later. But yeah it starts monday. ( literally what my head was wanting to say haha I had to STFU and tell it to myself in my head.)
He left to run errands and I said Ok and kept doing my laundry. I feel like I can relax a bit now that he left. Trying to hurry up and finish my to do list I had before he decided to show up. Laundry. Pack for tonight. Go over income taxes. Goal to leave by 1ish when the kids nap vs my normal 7-8 pm at night.
I'm venting here so A- I dont kill my friends with the boring details of my life B- I can keep being strong today, at least on the outside.
