do nothing or what

[roist]

Thanks Squiggy,
Your two replies really helped. Living in the situation we realise things but just need that little push in the right direction from time to time.Or even a swift kick in the behind.
I have gone back over my actions/goals and 180s. For various reasons some have slipped a notch or two. I will take a few days to put structure on my thoughts and to formulate what I am going to DO.

Zypher,
Good insights as usual. I have longtime accepted that my M is dead, just like all our cyber buddies here. The only difference is our W's were not running out the door. Anyway if we do recover it will be a new M a new at. I don't want the old one back.
I'll probably reply more after I have thought about it all more.

Thanks to both of ye and mutatia's description I have food for thought. I will post an action plan and my thinking behind it. I will use what she has said, what ye and others have said, what I know/think myself and other sources of guidance. It is time to up the game.

I will work hard on what she said. Yes for her but in reality they are what I wanted too! Furthermore they are part of the me I want to be regardless of who I am with and they are what I want for my sons. They compliment the traits roadmap already outlined.

Whereas overall I am buoyed and empowered by this thinking,a part of me is disappointed. I knew these grievances. I knew she wanted those things from me. I have answers, reasons and excuses, probably valid, but that is not good enough. I have improved even after slipping back, but now it us time to become the real me.

Cheers guys.

Anyone else with tips/comments are welcome to join in, especially some female insight on how to be a stronger man of the house/stronger dad. That is my next step.