Hi Thornton, NYGal, Rednail and Rain, thank you for your posts.
I'm not doing very well. In floods of tears right now again. We have argued tonight and now I'm so upset and scared that that means there is no chance of R now.
He came round at 6:30pm again despite knowing I needed to use the car to run an errand with D. D had a meltdown about going out which ended in me having to tell her off. H was down stairs while this was going on. When I got down stairs he asked me if she was being difficult so I said yes. He then asked if he'd done something wrong as he felt like I was being snappy with him!?!? I just don't understand where he's coming from to keep asking me if he's done something wrong. Does he not think leaving his wife and kids is doing something wrong?!?! Am I supposed to be happy about it and OK with him for doing it? Anyway, I let it slide and D and I went out leaving S at home with H.
When we got back it was already close to bed time so I said they both needed to go upstairs and bath/shower etc ready for bed. Tantrums from S followed as he hadn't had a chance to play on PS with H. I asked why he hadn't done that while D and I were out, we'd been out an hour. H said S hadn't been interested in playing together, S said H had just been sat on his phone and hadn't been interested. They had a quick game and H was his usual snappy self with S - it is like watching two children not a father and son. Always been the same.
I was busy downstairs and H went upstairs to say his goodbyes. S came down and asked what were we going to do about Dad. I asked what he meant and he said that Dad was in such a bad mood. I told S there wasn't much we could do about that unfortunately.
When I went upstairs with S, H said goodbye and was going to leave. He is taking D to a party tomorrow as I have a meeting. I asked him if he's also collecting her from school and he asked why he needed to!! I said I just thought he would collect her seeing as he's taking her to the party. He started shouting about not even knowing what time the party is and that he has to literally beg for information about anything that is going on these days! I asked him why he was shouting and he said he didn't know how I dared because all I do is shout. I queried this as it is completely unfounded. He said all I'd done tonight was shout at the kids. I couldn't believe what I was hearing! Yes, I'd told D off during the going out incident and I'd also had to tell S off twice and he equates it to me doing nothing but shout!
I'd already told him what time the party was when I asked him if he could take D but of course he's forgotten that and just accused me of not telling him. Then he said I insinuated he would be late for the party if he didn't pick D up from school. Again I was confused as to how I've insinuated this just by asking him if he's collecting her. I said I just thought he wouldn't want to exchange kids with my Mum if my Mum collected her from school. He left very angry saying he would collect her. Slammed the door, slammed the gate, slammed the car door.
I feel like this whole thing is going rapidly down the plug hole. I don't understand what I'm doing wrong to keep having these arguments. Now I'm sitting here distraught that it's all over.
