QUOTE __________________________________________________________ Lastly and most importantly, I finally understand that the reason he doesn't want a divorce or to work on reconciliation is because both paths require effort.
That is the crux of everything here. He likes doing nothing. He likes not being responsible or making decisions. Getting a D would require a lot of time, money and effort to finish the split. Working on reconciliation also requires more than just showing up somewhere.
With this, I realized something earth shattering. I don't love this man. I loved the man I married--the guy who loved me back and treated me like his only love. The father of my girls. But that guy has been gone for a few years now. Frankly, I don't think that guy is ever coming back because it requires too much effort and thought.
And I don't love the man who doesn't stand for anything. Really.
So as always, the ball is in my court. I'll spend the next month or so really devoting energy to what I want to happen. I really don't want to be in a M where separation is going to linger indefinitely.
To quote BB King: The thrill is gone ___________________________________________________________
Wow Betsey -
Your statement about loving the man you married not what he is now sounds like one of the subjects on the threads. I'd like to find that field that is holding all those old good husbands - I'd even pay the ransom.
Sounds like you had a great birthday. Thanks for visiting my thread - I needed the heads up.
Mary
"God, help me keep my head up, my heart open, and know I'll always be guided along the path."
