IMO, I would not try to give any set amount of time to stay with your mother. The point is not so much about how long you stay, as it about why you stay. However, I think you should go with the intentions of it making a sizable difference in your erratic around your family. And personally, I think that would take more than just a handful of days.
As to what to say to your W about staying with your mum, I think you could just tell her that you need some space. Don't say much more than that, and when she ask how long.....you don't know at the moment. I can't see her objecting, b/c she wants you to leave.
Again, I am pleased you have uped the counseling. I did not see that you had made an appointment with a lawyer, yet. If you have discussed this with one in the past, I have forgotten.......which is very possible, b/c I had forgotten about your father being deceased. Logical explanation of why you would refer to the home as your mum's, huh?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
