Hi Sotto - I agree completely with everyone else. I thought just as Mleigh did in that your h has a choice where he wants to live and with that chichi choice comes a price tag. His choice is not on you.

I am jumping over here because you just posted (on my thread) the degressive order of your h's wish list to fix the m. My h followed the same pattern but vocalized a different order: wanting to be a father again, unhappy with where he was in life, lonely, wanting to sleep with other women and having me be sexy all the time + other "recommendations" in this same vein.

It is quite astounding, to me, that your h asked this and was mid-A. It is amazing that he could not see that the common denominator in this whole dynamic was him!

You are a very kind, good person Sotto. I always appreciate all your advice to me and to others.

Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13
BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself
BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room"
8/15: H back to MBR
10/15: H back in dorm room
1/18: H files, now divorced