That's the problem. If I turn off my phone then I can't be on here! And I speak to my family and friends. I will not suffer because of him anymore than I have already. I do put my ringer off when I go to bed which helps.
OOPS! DIdn't realize you were on your phone. DON'T turn it off! LOL
You can turn the ringer down so it doesn't keep beeping and notifying you. That would help at least a little.
Surely he will change his tune in the mornin. Of course, you probably won't want to hear about it by then.
I'm a bit worried about you getting your $ back. I mean, if he's blowing through the $ that fast, do you really think he's going to hand any of it back over to you? It's just hard for me to even imagine that he would spend $$ on that when he should be using it to pay his bills, buy groceries, etc FIRST. He definitely needs to go get himself help before he digs a deeper hole.
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
OOPS! DIdn't realize you were on your phone. DON'T turn it off! LOL
You can turn the ringer down so it doesn't keep beeping and notifying you. That would help at least a little.
Surely he will change his tune in the mornin. Of course, you probably won't want to hear about it by then.
I'm a bit worried about you getting your $ back. I mean, if he's blowing through the $ that fast, do you really think he's going to hand any of it back over to you? It's just hard for me to even imagine that he would spend $$ on that when he should be using it to pay his bills, buy groceries, etc FIRST. He definitely needs to go get himself help before he digs a deeper hole.
MB I do one better. I put my phone to complete silence. I don't even hear the ding. But I do still see the little envelope on top. Oh well.
And I will be at his job to get his debit to take my money out of the bank. And if the weather is bad and he is home on payday I will be there early to do the same. Can't leave him alone with that card too long or you're right, I'll never get my money.
But, you know, I'm the one that needs to grow up.
Rain (moi): 40 Ex Fiance: 39 3 kids On/off again EA & PA Last BD by ow 12/15 Moved kids and myself back into our own place: 12/15
So, once upon a time we had a conversation where I told him that he did all of this on purpose because he was too chicken sh!t to be honest and say he just wanted to be with ow or be single.
So he did what he did to try and force me to leave him so that he could feel justified (as in, well, she left me!). And that if he wanted to put us both on the singles path he should have just told me and left me instead of all of the madness and mayhem he created.
Then I text him back last night as I posted here. This morning he sent the following...in this order over the course of 3 hours. Just to show that the crazy is still in full effect.
- Just so you know YOU set yourself on the single path with that mouth
-I hope you enjoyed your night love
-I can't even ask how my kids are (referring to the fact that I don't jump and give him updates 30 times a day to ease his guilt)
-Maybe youre right. Its my fault. I guess I'm the one that starts with my sh!t whenever I go over there to see you and the kids ( the less than what? 5 times in 2 months)
-You know what? It's me that brings up ow too. Im just a scumbag pos like that
-I hope you enjoy the rest of your day love
So yep, he is mental. He needs help, seriously. I'm pretty used to his ridiculousness but it still cuts me like a knife sometimes. And really if the first text was talking about me being single then why send the rest? And really? My mouth set me on my single path? Not your A and cam girls and lies? Screw him to the tenth power!
He very quickly told me he would rather not be with me and start fresh. So I guess all of this is to ease his guilt somehow.
Rain, does he have a mother or sister or someone that you get along with? If so, perhaps you could communicate through them only. If it's something important, he can have them contact you. Then, you can block his #. You should not have to read all of those messages just to find out of there is an important one in there about the kids.
Actually, what you really should do is set up a visitation SCHEDULE for him to follow just like the courts would. He can see them at those times and otherwise would have no reason to need to contact you. That way, you can block his # anyway. He is keeping you in a constant state of being upset. He is emotionally abusing you on a daily basis and you shouldn't have to put up with it.
And, btw, you are NOT the one that needs to grow up. You are doing just fine. You're just trying to get over a devastating event that has happened in your life. What has happened is horrible and excruciating, and he is making it impossible for you to have even a moments peace in your life because he is constantly spewing his self hate on you and keeping you in a constant state of upset because of his emotional abuse. You are not the immature child, he is. Don't take the blame for that!
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
Wait, is it his mother that is sick right now? Or, his grandmother? Sorry, I can't remember.
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
OMGosh Rain...sometimes I think you and I are talking about the same man. lol That is the exact kind of stuff that would come out of my H's mouth.
I'm glad you are getting your money. Does he know that you know how he spent the money you gave him?
No he doesn't know that I know. And really? Your H too? And here I thought mine was special. LOL
I SO want to be where you are Anna. His crazy is rubbing off on me. If he is so happy and is glad that we are both single now, then why is it that his texts are all somehow putting the blame on me instead of being strictly about child support and The kids?
And it's sad. So very sad. When I would be sad and cry and plead when he would make one of his "we are DONE and it's all your fault!" declarations, it was a turn off. When I DON'T do those things and I resign myself (or pretend to while I am on here being sad and angry and crying) somehow that isn't okay either.
If in his eyes, he finally has what he wanted. To be single, what is the flipping problem. Granted it hasn't been long but I did stop texting him and calling him and leaving him VMs. So what's the deal?!
And I'll be damned if I ask him to change his mind or reconsider for the kids sake. I will NOT do it. I already left the VM the other night. I am not doing it again.
Wait, is it his mother that is sick right now? Or, his grandmother? Sorry, I can't remember.
It's his mom MB. And our sitch is complicated. His work schedule is only semi fixed. He works 5 to 7 days a week and from 8 to 12 plus hours. Due to weather he may have a day off. Other times his boss finds other things for them to do.
His place is falling apart since we left him. True? Who knows. But he can't visit with them at his. And since we have no extra money (hmmm wonder why) he can't take them to any of the indoor play areas.
So until he gets a new place and/or the weather warms up it's my place. And he won't okay a set schedule because of what he is doing but uses the above as the reason. Oh the above and me and my mouth.
None of our family lives here and I am not telling anyone about what he is doing. I know its on him but it's still humiliating.
I am more than willing to let him visit with the kids and go out. When I offer this, he cancels. If I'm not home he won't come. Not that he comes by much anyway. And that isn't fair to the kids.
At this point I don't actually care if he won't come by. He is the one missing out.
And I know that he is the one that needs to grow up. Just wrote that as it's what he tells me. LOL
Every time he says it I so want to reply like this.....
Him: Grow up!
Me: Says the father of 3 that lives like a perpetual horny teenager! Tee hee
I am more than willing to let him visit with the kids and go out. When I offer this, he cancels. If I'm not home he won't come.
So, don't tell him! Wait till he gets there, then get your keys and leave!
Originally Posted By: Rain75
I will behave. I will behave. I will behave!
No you won't! LOL What fun is that?
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
