Add me to those who think you're on the money with money. My H and I also had issues about money... though they weren't ones I was filled in about until after the bomb.
Your point about control is very interesting. My H saw my asking him to account for his spending in our computer accounting program as control... that I was trying to control everything H spent.
I am by upbringing more frugal than H, but I never cared if he spent $50 on rotten tomatoes, as long as the money was there to spend (which it was) and the checkbook balanced at month's end without hours of detective work.
And there is the issue of who is bringing in what income, too. Though I saw it as one pie, H was keenly aware of our individual income levels.
