Letting go, finally

[JGuy]

As for my sitch, here's today's update.

This morning, my W came to my room in tears. I was getting dressed, she sat on my bed and just looked at me, sighed. She told me she had a dream about me that was powerful, and that she isn't ready to give up yet. She asked to call off the decision to separate that we had made yesterday. She said that she wants more time to think about it. I didn't really respond yes or no. I reminded her that her unwillingness to be honest and commit to NC was the main blocker for me, and that even then I could never go back to the old M. It would take nothing less than transformative change for both of us. She nodded, but with an overwhelmed look on her face.

She told me that she started reading "The Truth" by Neil Strauss, which is a book by a man who worked though his own waywardness. She said it is really helping her. She has also started listening to "The Smart Couple" podcast that I told her I started listening to a couple weeks ago.

I was kind to her today, and pleased to see that she seems to be making an effort, but I really didn't get my hopes up. I just continued to do my own thing today as I have been for awhile now.