Betsey, you are such an inspiration to me. You are so strong and wise, through the school of hard knocks.
Mr W has to come back full force, what kind of fool would be able to refuse you? That's a ridiculous assumption, any man would be lucky to have you. Duh.
Seriously, you have said some very insightful things and congratulations on your 13 lbs.
Seattle--Mr. W. would not appeal to me in spandex or a spandex thong. There might be laws against 43 year old men wearing them? One could only hope...
Meredith and Myrrh--Thank you for clarifying things for me today. It's nice to have a pinch hitter come in for me when I'm not able to bat myself.
Pattie--It's not necessarily the past MC sessions that have me wary. They were actually good in many ways. But you're right about the past having some bearing here. I really don't want the old Mr. Wonderful back. I want the new and improved version of him.
A guy who shows initiative to heal and a willingness to work for something worthwhile. I can handle fear and caution coming from him but not indifference. No more indifference--I've had a steady diet of that stuff for the past 2 years, and it stinks. It leaves a crappy aftertaste and makes me feel terrible when I subject myself to more than I should.
I deserve to be with a man who wants me. I think this is what you said in your post in different words, LNL. And I agree with you that I probably worded my counseling incorrectly right now:
I am seeking counseling for myself, regardless of the outcome.
Does that sound better?
There is victory and triumph awaiting me--and all of us, ocean friends. I will work on my end of the bargain to the best of my ability and put all my training here to good use!
That path is paved with bricks of patience, understanding, forgiveness, caring, sharing and a willingness to hear his truths about me and our marriage.
Go us!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Quote: That path is paved with bricks of patience, understanding, forgiveness, caring, sharing and a willingness to hear his truths about me and our marriage.
I believe that we should share that award you are willing to give me! LOL!
thanks for dropping by my thread, I don't know where we pull all this patience from, I don't know how we can juggle doing so much at one time. I could be crazy you know, LMAO!
So what are you hoping will happen in MC? That Mr. W will openly discuss what made him leave, past problems, or ??? I guess I'm a little fuzzy on what MC actually does.
Hiya Mom! (I'm actually finding myself comfortable calling you this now... )
Well, MC has an enormous draw for both of us. Think of MC as Houston. I, of course, am the project manager in this miserable Apollo 13-like program. I used to be pissed that the entire mission went awry, but I'm solution focused now and I have my best engineers working on the solution. Hee hee. That's all of you!
So Mr. Wonderful has made his turn around the moon, and has had a really rocky trip out there in space. He's had lots of things happen that he didn't anticipate, and it turns out that he actually has stated to me that he doesn't want to stay in outer space.
The way I see it, that offers 2 options: Letting Houston and his PM give up on him and let him die in peace out in space, or trusting them to guide him back to earth.
In order for that to happen, this PM needs Houston's help. Houston has to explicitly describe the landing procedures and give both of us hope that the landing can happen successfully and without injury.
BTW, Mr. Wonderful is a rocket scientist, so this is a really appropriate analogy in our lives.
Our MC is a SBT--that is, he's a solution-oriented, certified marriage counselor who is PRO-MARRIAGE. His expertise and knowledge is going to be pivotal in getting the landing module back to earth without burning up on reentry.
We both trust him and like him.
I'm sure we would both benefit from Retrouvaille, but right now that's not on the table. Maybe later (I'm Catholic, he is not).
I know why Mr. Wonderful left and what his feelings have been. And he knows what issues I had as well. We've already discussed what we resented and which details needed defining--all this came out in the 5 months before, so it wasn't for nothing. In fact, I happened to see that Mr. W. kept his notes in a notebook, which he left on the dining room table one night...
Now, all of you Houston engineers, you ready to stand by your consoles and prepare to advise? It's standby time for now, because first solo C session for me is April 15th. I'll have lots to discuss when I make it to Seattle the following afternoon!
Sans spandex...
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I'm glad you find my analogies good and this path worthwhile in your own journey. I feel so blessed to have come across some incredibly neat and wonderful people here myself. I will never be the same because of it.
I'm taking a page out of your rule book as well. Some day I hope to go out on a date with the Unfunny Stooge (Curly Joe, aka Mr. Wonderful) and have something amusing to report. You're ahead of me there, girlfriend.
I aim to amuse. I shall keep that motto at heart in my future postings...
Moe (the mean and bossy stooge that I am, right Hud?) aka Underdog, Betsey, Bruce, Bob Barker
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
So I didn't get a chance to catch up on today's log of entries...I thought I scared you away w/my post last night only to find out that you jumped ship on me. I'll catch you later on. (Could ya slow down for me a bit?? I can't seem to swim that fast LOL) Tootles........
UD, I'm trying to swim too!!! I had an appt. w/my psychiatrist last night and as a general rule, I don't go to any appt's w/o something to read, so I printed the pages where I had left off with you!!
I'm thinking about you. The $ sit. really helped me to not be upset about our $ sit. and be able to look at it differently. I guess I thought that EVERYONE would think, "you're married-you SHOULD share a bank account." Or, as my MIL said, "that's not a marriage," as she spends WAY more than they earn & he doesn't even know how much debt they have!! hmm...
I can see now where it was probably a control thing in my M also. ( NOT THAT I HAVE ANY TROUBLE WITH THAT ISSUE MIND YOU!! ) We have separate accounts now, because of the pending legal issues, so WHEN we get back together I think is should stay the same.....
One could only hope...
) We have separate accounts now, because of the pending legal issues, so WHEN 
we get back together I think is should stay the same.....