"Genuine repentance always involves a confession of wrongdoing and a willingness to make things right. An apology often takes the form of an excuse".

If your W is sincere about wanting to work on the M, then she should be willing to make things right with you. My question to her would be what's the big deal about her writing a NC to the OM if the affair is over? I can think of a couple of reasons she doesn't want to carry through with the letter, however, if she's really willing to make things right again..........

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Wife is still expecting me to just be peachy when I'm around her. She did me a favor, right? No divorce, I should be just jumping through hoops for the family and for her now.


I've read where a lot of WW's have this attitude. They apologised, and now they want to have the MR just simply return to point where it left off before the A ever happened. You see, the WW doesn't want to do the hard work that's required to repair the M. The mistake on the part of many LBH'S is taking her back without requiring that work.

This leads me to a question to you. What are you prepared to do, besides remind her she hasn't done XXX yet?

I know this must be terrible on your nerves, wondering every day if she's wrote the letter yet. I think you may need to get through a couple of days without asking her again, or hinting around about it. When a woman does that, it's called nagging. smile You have to see if she's going to take the initiative to do the right thing, or if it's more to get you off her back.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!