Rollercoaster at rest: now what?

[Azzork]

Again, I ask to you: what are you going to do to get better? It isnt going to just 'happen'. I GO TO A REBUILDING SEMINAR ONCE A WEEK, I'M READING THE LOST ART OF LISTENING, WHICH WONKA RECOMMENDED, I'M LOOKING AT A LOT OF POSTS ON HERE. I'M SPENDING TIME WITH FRIENDS. I EXERCISE EVERY DAY. I GO TO THERAPY. I TAKE A MULTI-VITAMIN!! AND I'M GOING TO LOOK INTO ST. JOHNS WORT TOO.

This all sounds pretty good. One thing that realllllly helped me was to step out of my comfort zone and meet some NEW people. People that didnt know about my sitch that I could just be "me" with. Are you doing any of that?

It's time for you to take control of YOUR life. What fun stuff do you have planned this week? What new people are you going to meet? FUN STUFF? Well, I'm swimming tonight. Dinner with friends tomorrow night and then again on Thursday. Weekends are still tough -- can't plan that far ahead.

Sounds good. But, it's time to start thinking about weekends. You KNOW they are tough, so start lining some things up now. Otherwise, youll end up home alone twiddling your thumbs. Is there a meetup in your area that might be interesting?

I have some hopeful news. W appeared outside my office window this morning, looking up at me. I waved, waved again. No response. She looked so sad. So I walked out there, and we had a relationship talk that she initiated. Bottom line, she misses me, misses the dogs, misses the energy I brought to the house, apologized for the lies and deception, says she needs more time alone. I said I do, too, and that we should take this time to focus on each of us individually, so that we're both healthier. She reiterated that she wants to find a therapist.

The bolded sounds....not great to me. Why go out and meet her needs every time? Let her be for now. If she really wants to talk to you, she will come find you. Just my opinion though....this is twice in a row that youve been around her and YOU have gone up to HER to initiate conversation. Why not let her come to you for once?