New guy

[mbebos]

Good morning all. I can't shake this last little wave of feeling ill. Been almost a week with no workouts. I was going to try today but still feel pretty awful. I have a doc appointment today, so I didn't want to get up an hour early for a workout I couldn't give 100% to.

This weekend was a wild ride of emotions. There were times when I was thinking my life was over, times an hour later when I was feeling on top of the world, then right back down. Times when I was feeling mad, which is new and times when I just cried my eyes out. I did my best to stay busy. Friday was full, Saturday a little bit, Sunday 50/50.

Today, I am feeling grateful for my cousin. We reunited a year and a half ago after 20 years when dad died, and while she was a pain in the butt in the beginning, right now she is the only person that checks in almost every day. She is older than I am and has 2 grown boys, so she has that motherly instinct. She worries about my eating, my sleeping, the anxiety attacks, etc. I have been spending a lot of time with her family. She had her husband cheat, and get his A partner pregnant. When she left and came back home, he stayed behind, and when the OW dumped him, he came home broken when he realized his W had moved on after the D. She eventually stopped dating the guy she was dating, and let him back in the house for the kids. He never forgave himself. They are "together" today, but not remarried. He still sits in his regret hole, never fully coming back mentally.

I am grateful that she has been there for me.