Here again after 9 years and struggling 3

[Zues126]

It leaves me feeling that there really isn't any hope for my M, as H has already told me, I blew it a long time ago by treating him how I did. I felt I had my reasons, and as your 'card game' has shown, he felt he had his too.

First of all, believe none of what he says and have of what he does.

But, for your 180s...think back to how your low numbers were reflected. This should tell you where to start looking.