REALLY trying to detach...but GALing regardless!

[- MB -]

I feel like I had an amazing life, with someone I adored, and now it's gone in an instant. I know they all say it will get better, and I suppose after a great deal of time has passed it will. But will it ever get great again? And can I survive the process intact? That's what I don't know.

NYGal, I am sorry that you had a bad night as well. You can do this and so can I. Really no choice other than to just go through the pain and trust that we will be better people when we make it through it. Better for ourselves either with or without our spouses. And, yes, someday it will be great for you again. As far as surviving the process intact, you will. I think the key really is to detach and let go. I have only seen glimmers of this, but it is so peacefull when it happens. Then, I let my mind get in my way and I panic again and loose the progress I've made. I will get this eventually and so will you. Detachment is the hardest part. Just keep working at it. Keep supporting each other. Keep putting one foot in front of the other on this journey that we are on. And, slow deep breaths.

I hope you're having a good day! I'm off to shower and get ready for work. They will make sure I have my makeup on and dressed and ready to go before they call me off. Grrr.... Makeup should be fun. My eyes are so swollen from my meltdown last night with all the crying that there is no amount of makeup that will ever hide it. It's actually hard to keep my eyes open all the way because my eyelids feel so heavy. I actually hope they do call me off tonight or this is going to be embarrasing.