Need support navigating the change in my marriage

[Tyler12]

G8r, i understand that after what seems like a great day gets followed by what in turn seems like the worst day ever.
a little insight from me as to your last post and maybe a vet or someone can point out if i am not on the mark with what i suggest

I'm a bit angry and hurt today. A few weeks ago I saw that a local play house was doing Peter Rabbit and suggested we take D3 to see it.

Ok, my thought on this is why suggest we? i understand you want things to seem as normal as possible for D3, i really do get that. Is doing things as a family really the best idea right now? Sandi posted on my thread when i suggested the supper thing. It will be very confusing to the child, especially if/ when you are no longer living together. We should go to me suggests family or friend time, you are neither right now, friendly and civil are 2 different things, i am coming to understand and employ this.

I really feel that the only reason we argue is because the om is in the picture and she thinks she wants to get married to him and have a child as quick as possible. If he wasn't in the picture, my WW and I could possibly work on R. She has even said so herself but she refuses to dump him. Grrrrrr.

Ok, another issue i had and have let go of staying focused on this. It still bothers me from time to time and my imagination runs wild, but thats all it is, is me backsliding into being a glass is half empty person, not fun for anyone.
So, if she were to end it with OM do you honestly think that all would be forgiven and she would come running back to rebuild M? In my case no i dont. If it werent current OM why couldnt it be some other person, The reason W is seeking what she gets from OM is because she does not see herself ever getting what she needs from you right now! Its hard to hear, it was for me to, we just need to accept it, focus on you and D3. Not M, not fixing things. I can say without a doubt that D3 feels and is acting out of sorts because of the tension in your house, My S3 for sure did! It took me a bit but one day i realized, do i want my son to become a man and have a woman treat him this way? In your sitch, do you want your D3 to feel she can treat her H the way your W is showing her how to treat H?
I am not saying become some macho man and show her whos boss, im saying sit down, think of what boundaries you want, refine them, and then set them, do not waiver.
If you have read Sandi's forum you know that WaW does not have respect for LBS, your W or mine may never respect us again, I however refuse to not respect myself and let myself be a doormat or pushover for anyone, not just W. I hope you can focus on yourself and regain some self respect, I am working on it too

Hang in there friend, we are just getting going!