It's all blowing up

[LITB]

What do you mean she is staying in the house and you are going to be out in the cold?

What did your L say? You are allowing FEAR to be your guide. You have to stand your ground.

One of the things that motivated me, was the thought of my children asking me what happened when they got older. I wanted to be able to look them in the eyes and tell them I did my best. I made some HUGE mistakes along the way, because of FEAR. It cost me time with my children and a lot of money on a L.

I have a friend who lived in PA, whose sitch was about 6 months behind mine. It was very similar to mine, as his W wanted a D and wanted to leave the state to AZ. I told him not to allow her to leave the state with their sons. I had already made that mistake. He didn't listen. His W moved, the D was finalized and he had to find a job in AZ.

The point is, sometimes we allow fear to guide us directly to the land of regret. I'm guilty of it and I hope you learn from my experience.

Can you get us up to speed on the D? She wants your help with Financials is what we know. Has she filed? I gather that she has a L who is preparing to file. Have you agreed to anything? Doesn't matter if you haven't signed. Don't sign anything. If she has a L, I highly suggest your retain your own. Let them go back and forth and remove yourself from the negotiations. It will cost you money, but if you don't protect yourself, it will likely cost you more later.

I'm sure you have an idea how much she makes. Did you have your L run the numbers for you in regards to SS and CS? During our second separation, knowing this information was invaluable.

I realize this isn't exactly DB'ing, however it all ties together.