Julie, Jellyb has great ideas. Make the routine pre-swap as fun and comfortable as possible. How do you feel pre-swap? Your S might be picking up on these vibes from you. If so, you need to act as if.

I always feel like strangling the X whenever I see him, but I always fake it in front of kid. I put my RBF away for a while. Kid is not the enemy. Your S is not the enemy. Like what jellyb said, put aside the LBS persona and put on the living mum persona.

These difficult exchanges won't convince your H that divorce is terrible. Because your S actually has a great time with him. The convincing will have to come at a time when your H can be convinced.

You can call me Dory/ Grl.

As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"

It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.