Probably time to start setting some boundaries, man. She's running all over you.
You two don't need to figure out the finances, that's what she's paying a lawyer to do, right? so let him do his job. If she's curious, she can figure it out on her own. For God's sake don't help her!
You are the one being left, what right does she have to demand anything from you around the house? focus on you and your D.
If she wants to get confrontational, you have every right to not engage and walk away, so do it.
Don't let her get "snippy" with you. You tell her "I don't let people talk to me that way, and I won't let you talk to me that way, either." then you walk away.
Let her be pissed off. She isn't respecting you in this process AT ALL. You literally owe her nothing. That doesn't mean you meet fire with fire, though. let her burn herself to the ground.
FYI,
I'm not saying there is or isn't an A, but she may be looking to move quickly for a reason.
FYI2: you're from PA, right? PA is a "fault-based" State, which means PA will give it weight to an Affair in D cases, which in turn, can be used as leverage for you if you are concerned with your finances.
Many say not to snoop, but in this case, you may be protecting yourself.
