My W is very much the same way and I am much like you.
I have not been able to confirm whether my W has an OM but I am fairly certain she does. I have custody of my boys while she has fled back to her parents in another city. Difficult for me to show change. Continue to do what is right for you that is the best path to take.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...