SciDad, I don't have any advice, I just want to send you hugs and I am so sorry. You need off this rollercoaster. My thinking is that if she is going to keep lying and sneaking around she needs to see what life would be like without you. I am not saying to leave her, but I don't think you should be scraping the ice off her windshield or cuddling up to her at night. And I think its time to get an amplifier for your guitar.
