Where I am...

[mahhhty]

Mahhhty, it sounds like you are doing well. So glad you stopped obsessing, that is a huge step forward.

I am glad you are busy, even though too busy to post, its a good sign that your life is moving forward.

Thanks Fo.2!

I think so. My interactions with her have changed as well. I'm looking her in the eye having easy conversations.

I realized the un-importance of actions, & conversations. For a long time I hinged everything on the idea of a moment. "A moment could improve my situation, it could turn it all around"..... but thats not true. The only moments (I could generate) are just those moments I manufacture. They aren't genuine moments, they aren't moments in which her heart is open, has respect, has remorse or any of those other qualities that are required for reconciliation. It may take her 1 year to get there, it could also take her 20 years and 20 relationships, she could also never get there.

I love the idea of my family. I love the woman I married, but I don't know this woman and shouldn't be hinging my future on an unknown. Life is too short.