A big thanks for all those who checked in on me: Ancaire, Fo, tl2, Gmum, Dday, Fogg and NYGal. And the many other DBers who had dropped by my thread.
Maybe I am not supposed to find land so soon. Maybe it is my destiny to wander around in the seas for a bit and kind of be an explorer.
Just a very quick update:
The teenage mutant ninja head lice are still there. Thank God kid's head is clear. I just have to worry about my own. I guess after all that I have been through, I just have to look for the little pleasures in life. Quite miffed that the lice saga has quite effectively put a stop to my GAL activities as I have to be cooped up in the apartment most of the time.
No clear answers as yet. A talk with a family member just yielded more questions -- said family member seemed to be as clueless as I am. Bless his heart for wanting me to try but now I am very wary. Both of us can see the issues in the marriage and that I wasn't the only one at fault but the hindsight is just that hindsight. I can work on myself but not on the M anymore. The X and the TP's relationship seems to be heating up and kid is asking more and more painful and uncomfortable questions.
The X seems keen to spend time with kid but I hate it when forgets about appointments, comes late or makes last minute changes. Bittersweet how it takes a lice scare from kid to make him call me for the first time in 4 months. When he asked me where I was, I had to bite my tongue so that I wouldn't retort that it was none of his business. Just told him I was out and that he would have to wait for a while because I had been expelled from Hogwarts and they confiscated my Firebolt.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
I'm so happy you're back, Grl! I've been a bit worried, to be honest.
Still with the lice?!? Those suckers must be evolving like cockroaches. Great.
I think we're all explorers in a sense. We show up here lost, frightened, so very very shaken...and then we start to find answers. Not necessarily the ones we came in such of, but answers nonetheless. I certainly feel like I'm on an adventure - one I didn't choose - but I have no idea where I'll wind up.
After all these months, you're going to laugh at me, but I have a quick question. You use the initials TP to refer to OW...what do they really stand for? I bet it's obvious, but I haven't figured it out yet.
After all these months, you're going to laugh at me, but I have a quick question. You use the initials TP to refer to OW...what do they really stand for? I bet it's obvious, but I haven't figured it out yet.
I promise I am not laughing at you. Fo asked the exact same question and thought that it could be 'toilet paper'. I use it for 'third party/ turd party' but 'toilet paper' sounds good to me too.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
Hi dday, I swear I am seriously considering the idea. If it doesn't compromise my professional credibility.
I am becoming quite the pro at what to do for a lice infestation though - for males, it would be to just shave your hair and get it over and done with!
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
Wow. Dating? Are you sure you're ready for that? There is some wisdom (Zues) that says you should wait at least one year after your divorce is final to even begin to think about dating. This gives you time to fully resolve the hurt and pain from your last relationship, and keeps you from getting involved in a rebound relationship, which could cause even more pain.
Perhaps you're right. Maybe it's a half-hearted attempt to prove to the X that I am not unwanted.
I have only just set up my profile and half-heartedly cropped my face from a FB Photo. Nothing concrete yet and only just looking at matches the site has churned out for me.
But I guess it will be nice to have some adult male company. I am moving very cautiously, and for the time being, just wanting to broaden my social circle.
One of the questions for the profiling made me cringe though - what are your feelings about sex on the first few dates? Big gulp. The thought of it makes me quite queasy.
I never thought that I would have to venture into the dating world again and having to be physically intimate with another person? Not quite there yet.
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
You are not unwanted, for crying out loud! H has made the biggest mistake of his life. He is not worthy of you. Don't you even begin to wonder what he may feel or think about anything.
He's run off, left his family, and for what? (OK - we know)
You, on the other, are firmly focused on what is important: this child that you brought into the world. He can't say the same.
You have your priorities right where they need to be - on kid. She didn't ask for any of this. I think it's too early for you to date, but I would never judge if you do. It's just my opinion.
I totally understand wanting to have someone available to do things with, a companion - but you have a daughter. Bringing a strange male around your D in these days and times? Ugh!
Maybe you could check into friendship sites instead of dating sites...lol Is there even any such thing?
You're not unwanted. And you're not Columbus. You're an undiscovered New World.
Only you know when you're ready to date and for what reasons. Be clear on them for yourself and then do what keeps you strong and what challenges you to grow in a good way. Again, only you know when that is.
I'm an advocate of waiting, but then I am by nature someone who eases into things.
So focus on getting strong and living out of your strength. If you're dating to prove something to anyone, even yourself, I'd suggest you think on that a bit.
I use it for 'third party/