Painter - I could have sworn I left you a comment!
The anger is hard to deal with. Some people say that anger is tied into fear. Is it possible there is an underlying fear that is triggering the anger?
I suppose mine would be "fear of abandonment" - but my H did a lot of the same things you're angry about. Giving my private letters to another woman to elicit sympathy and get her on his side for the purpose of dating her was probably the worst.
I'm not quite angry anymore - but I'm not quite over it, either. I guess in my case, my fear has happened. I've been abandoned - so what use is holding on to the anger.
I did make a conscious decision to forgive him, though. If you're still carrying anger, I'm not certain you've fully forgiven him. Maybe you need to spend some time sitting quietly with the feeling, and figure out what it is trying to tell you - there's a reason you're having the feelings.
Generally, true forgiveness sets you free. H doesn't care - well, not in the same way. Your anger was always about your feelings. So what is still bubbling away beneath the surface? A fear? A resentment? Something you're looking for, but are frustrated not to find?
You do need to figure it out so that you can be free. It'll choke your spirit if you're not careful. I like you too much to be willing to have that happen.
