Your feelings may be up and down, but your behavior has been consistent. That's what matters, and that's how you endure the 'for worse' part of your marriage.
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you're going to have to lead the way.
I agree with Ancaire as well, I just hesitate to think of ourselves as leading the way. It falls into the same pattern of thinking we have an understanding they don't, that we know what's right and are the ones that have it figured out, that we need to be so smart that they follow our lead somehow...this can be controlling and diminishing. For the marriage to work it sometimes means we have to trust our partner enough to follow their lead at times as well. A partnership can't work without two people that are capable of both being leaders.
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
