Hope you are feeling better by today. It's not only a bug that is letting you down. Emotions take a very big toll on our system and make us very week. So a little bug becomes a huge dinosaur since we are weak to fight.
Sotto I don't really know what to say besides the simple take one day at a time. The reality is that there is no other way around it, we need to feel it all and it hurts a lot.
But, interesting enough there is also a sense of freedom that we start seeing again. It is not right away, but slowly you start thinking if it is not even better then being in the boring R we were before.
This journey is not yet done. There are many things about your R that will start coming back to you. For me, being on a hope mode made somewhat blind for many bad memories in my M, then once D, I had this enormous sadness (what still comes and goes), but also the memory of many times when I just want to walk away from him because he was the worse jerk in the world.
I believe you need to take good care after yourself, rely on friends, family and this board and let all your emotions talk for itself. It won't be easy now, but it gets better.
We are indeed the most important person for ourselves, and there is a lot to live for, lots of adventures and new discoveries that will come just because you are in a new path.
Like many others here, I also need to say that you have been a great inspiration for me and I truly appreciate it all.
