Te amo Rouky! I'm pretty sure of what that means. If I am wrong I meant to say I love you Rouky! I have got to say that you are the most amazing person who has ever given me a second thought. I do have friends who speak foreign languages fluently but some of them are guys and I am completely straight. I have nothing against homosexuals but I don't have a gay hair on my head. What an intriguing person you are as I can only imagine the intellectual capacity that it requires to learn three languages. So I see that I bring nothing to the table compared to you but as I say I love to keep house and I am VERY giving physically;-) Now I am off to GAL because my W is at the scene of OM in the place that I first became aware of the A and I don't want to sit around and dwell on it. I am going to hang out with my cousin and some friends in Indy. Did I mention that I filmed her and OM with my phone and posted it to FB? That's how stupid I am. I just thought that it was a friendly thing and boy was I wrong. But Rouky ma cherie don't let my whining bring you down. You please smile at the goofiness of an American boy that is crazy about you and find something that makes you happy today. God Bless!
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
Te quieto tambien Shotgun :-)! I'm not intelligent, I'm just good at languages. My siblings are all scientists, so it'd have been boring for me to be like them. I love to stand out :-).
Everyone has qualities to bring in a relationship. No one is better than the other, we are only gifted in different skills. I'm a person that needs to feel loved by being given hugs, kisses and all that, so for that reason Shotgun you are a perfect match for me.
Shotgun...you filmed them RECENTLY, or back when it started? Because if you did it recently, seems not quite so bad that I drive by!! LOL
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
MB I would hate to be your IC! I think that you have the answers but you need a professional to force you to give them.
LOL...HEY! Every time I go to see him he starts by asking me to update him on anything new. He just sits there and shakes his head when I tell him all the things that I've done, said, thought, etc. I always let him know right before I say something stupid that I KNOW it's the wrong thing, but..... And he knows that something completely retarded is coming. He doesn't judge me, just listens and talks me through things. I know he must think I'm nuts though! And, at the very least, he KNOWS that I have a hard time staying away from H and from saying and doing the WRONG things when I'm around H.
Originally Posted By: shotgun
I hope that you are able to connect with the thought of him being that far from you causes you to pursue. Your job is to turn the tables. Easy for me to say because I can't do it either but I have reached the point where I do not want to look at her.
The sad thing is that I have understood this concept from the very beginning. I'm a smart person and usually think very logically, just seem to lack self control while I'm feeling so much pain, loneliness, and despair. I actually problem solve well and usually work well under pressure. Just can't seem to do that in my marriage. If I have a PLAN when I see him, I can fake it and follow through. But, when left with too much time by myself to sit and dwell on things, that's when I loose my mind, my DB skills, and any self control that I have and then I do really stupid things.
Originally Posted By: shotgun
God Bless you MB (Got to tell you that your initials are perfect). I once was more concerned with concealing my identity here but WTF!
Perfect initials??? How so? And, as far as I'm aware, you haven't given up your identity here. Unless I missed something. I just know that you're Shotgun from somewhere in Indiana who is madly in love with Rouky, but can't have her because she's married to an idiot that doesn't appreciate her. Did I get that right?
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
I perfectly agree with you MB, my H is an idiot who doesn't appreciate me. His loss not mine. It doesn't matter as Shotgun knows how to treat a woman and always brings a smile on my face :-).
Like you when I'm on my own, I think too much! What about watching a film? Reading a book? To keep your mind off your stitch!
MB, I wish we could go to a movie together when we're feeling down. The days are long and the nights are longer. Next time you feel like driving by, give me a call. We'll talk each other out of it. I haven't driven by yet, and hope I don't. That would be Torture with a capital T. I think if I saw her car at my house I'd have to do something I'd regret. So I stay away. I think I miss my house and garden as much as I miss W. Well, not really. I missed her so much yesterday it was a physical pain all day.
On to a new day. And I can't wait to hear what shotgun meant about your initials!
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Moi bien Rouky! My laptop doesn't have all of the punctuation keys for a foreign language. I'll look for one that does. Perhaps the one I am using has it but I am too computer illiterate to find them. I am not surprised that you come from a family of scientists. Your intelligence shows through your writing glaringly! I don't do anything interesting but I am an artist. In the US we have a term "Starving Artist" because if you try to make a living as an artist you will likely starve.
Ancaire, I am glad that I could make you chuckle. I am starting to see the hilarity in all of this. It happened just before BD and before my cancer diagnosis. It was a circle of friends that we were hanging with and everyone was so nice. I guess that I am too trusting. Not that I could have prevented the awakening that W had when she looked in his eyes but I had sensed trouble on the horizon for a year prior to that moment. Right around her fortieth birthday she began to radically change her behavior. She lost a whole lot of weight and started to color her graying hair, had her teeth whitened and changed everything in her wardrobe. She traded her Honda in for a BMW and began spending like a sailor on shore leave.
I have accepted that it is all too complex for me to figure out and I have vowed to never again waste emotional energy on her. We had a wonderful life together for thirteen years and did an awful lot of fun stuff. We have an amazing child who will go wherever he chooses to go with his music and I thank her for giving me that child. She isn't a bad person she is just handicapped by the events of her childhood which in the words of her therapist have trapped her at the emotional level of a thirteen year old. It was tough living in a house with one thirteen and one twelve year old child and a thirty-five year old who had the emotional development of a thirteen year old. Throw a baby in the mix and I never had a chance. I do walk with the comfort of having given her every ounce of my energy for the duration of our marriage and have no regrets. I only ever stood up to her on three occasions; I put my foot down on having a swimming pool installed, on building a garage that was bigger than our huge house and on having another child. However as I have stated before, we were married for fourteen years without using any form of birth control and she never became pregnant. She only wanted sex when she was PMSing and incapable of being impregnated. I did grow to love the cycle of the moon though and on clear nights I was able to get a feel for how things would go in the bedroom.
So you see MB it is true that I am much more stupid than you and filmed the end of my marriage and posted it for the world to see. I have never bothered to take that post down though and I am not especially torn up about it. These events were inevitable and if it wasn't him it would have been another guy. I do have curiosity in the fact that the guy works in the same field as I, enjoys all of the same things, is about my size and is born a couple of weeks after me in the same year. W told me that we were exactly alike except that he was successful. Again doesn't bother me as I was trying to raise a special needs child. I did it very well though and he is very accomplished and talented. His social skills while not perfect have developed into an ability to fit into society very well and in that I take enormous pride.
I love you all and on this Sunday I pray that we all can find a little peace today and that we have a healthy, fun and productive week!
M:53 W:47 M:15 years. S:18 S's: 30 & 28 from previous marriage. BD: 3/14 Divorced January 17.
