Dear Jelly, I've grown attached to your kind heart. I care about how you are feeling. You are my friend and I feel for you. I am happy this happens, I have learned empathy on this journey of self discovery. Maybe no empathy is a FOO issue?
Thank you Mu. I feel your kindness and empathy for me I do. It is appreciated and sorry if I came across as dismissive.
I have a favour to ask with regard to your experience of empathy for me. I wonder if you are able to extend some for your self for a moment. You choose where. You could you say to Mu, "I feel for you".
V can likely speak more to this than I can. When we cut of an emotion, we cut of many aspects of ourselves. It is a coping mechanism. I saw it with Mr Ex, spinal injury at 24 years, left him in a wheelchair. He prided himself on only crying once, and getting on with life 5 days later. He only ever experiences positive emotions, and has next to no empathy for anyone experiencing negative emotion. He has cut himself off from ever feeling down or sad. Because what would happen if he actually experienced his own sadness. Likely his fear told him it would kill him. But his inability to be empathetic killed my connection to him and his to me.
That's where true intimacy in relationships lives. In the empathy we have for the other person. Intimacy and connection also comes from our ability to be empathetic to ourselves. If we cannot fully accept ourselves for ourselves, then we can't stand vulnerable and naked (literally and figuratively) in front of the person we love and anticipate empathy, love and acceptance.
This is my journey Mu. So thank you for reminding me to allow others to be empathetic toward me.
So much love for you Mu. I hope it touches your heart and empty places just a little.
