Here again after 9 years and struggling 2

[Mona52]

IP,

You cant make your M better by moving forward with this much pain. It is oozing out everywhere. If you truly want to do what will help the most to get your M back, you have to let it go and find happiness.

I know everyone says "Dont make changes just to get your M back."

Ignore them. Go ahead and fake some changes and dont beat yourself up for doing them ONLY to get your M back.

The changes you have to do is find, at the very very minimum, 10 new things to add to your day that bring you a itsy bitsy tiny bit of joy. It does not matter what they are. I can throw some examples, but only you can do what you know you like.

1. Eat a chocolate bar
2. Listen to a comedian. My fav = John Mulaney - The Salt and Pepper Diner. It is not bad, but there might be a few swear words. Use the ladies room before you listen so you dont wet yourself laughing
3. Knit a baby cap to give to a local hospital
4. Do the electric slide FOR THE ENTIRE SONG!
5. Think of your child succeeding at a huge goal, like winning an award. (picture every detail)
6. Brace yourself, this one is a little... Think of performing a bedroom activity, but dont let H in your fantasy
7. Sing in the car REAL LOUD
8. Start a course online or night school at a local college
9. Play an instrument
10. Cook that real HARD to cook diner and dessert

Most of these are stupid, but mix some real life changing goals in with that and you have a recipe for less pain. That is our number one goal right now, less pain. Because a happier you will get H back.

(Dont worry about breaking the rules and doing it just for H, break the d@mn rules. Because after you do it for a while, you will start doing it for yourself, promise.)