LBH w/ a WXW after the D - now what

[G8r]

Hi gs9. I'm new here but after reading that last bit all I can say is Wow!!! I feel for you and the children. Great job by not taking her bait and engaging her.

[pinn]

Jeesshh... what a situation GS. I have no clue how you are dealing with this... I def would have lost it by now. No real advice from me. I would probably ignore and keep acting how you are. Like you said... sounds like she is trying to bully you.

[gs9]

Thanks G8r
It's been many years of engaging with her craziness. I've always known better but let her convince me that this is how some people communicate and it's appropriate. I know better.

WTF is she doing now? I think she is again trying to control the situation. She wants to know my schedule. I think I'll respond by telling her "if you're concerned with me being in my home you should just assume I'll be there every night."

[otw]

wow

I really think you need to have the talk with her about what it would take for things to work with each other.

It feels like you are mad at her for how she has become and in turn she is acting mad at you for her not getting her way.

I know you dont want to be with her the way she is, but I know you came here to try and figure out how to make things work.

I just feel things are rapidly becoming sort of childish. Mainly on her part.

I could be wrong but spelling out to her your thoughts may be the best thing. What harm can it really do?

If she fights or starts going on another rampage at least you tried to express your thoughts.

just my opinion.

[G8r]

I like your answer. It is assertive and straight to the point without being snippy, rude or nasty.

I can relate to you dealing with a controlling WXW. My WW has always been a bit of a control freak. I used to let it slide if it wasn't important to me. Now it is crazy annoying and only getting worse.

[gs9]

thanks Pinn,
It's been a wild ride. I often wish I was making all of this up. When we were in MC our C said it's ok to say "You're making Sh*t up" because she did on a regular basis. The best thing about that MC is that it was a lady and she continued to be her IC after we stopped MC.

It's funny (not haha but peculiar) the things WXW has told me her IC has said. Our IC's have had meetings and there are several things WXW said her IC said that my IC checked with her IC and her IC did not say. Such as....WXW said her IC told her I was a master manipulator. Well the IC's met and this is not true. WXW has told me several times and told my IC that her IC said this. Not true.

[gs9]

Hey otw
I don't think she is yet ready to consider anyone else's feelings especially mine. I have given her opportunities to apologize for her behavior, even guided her, but most of the time she still blames or deflects.

Yes, I am more than mad at her. I AM ANGRY WITH HER.
However, I do not allow these feelings to run my life or my interactions with her.

[gs9]

Ok.....When you throw yourself back into the mix it's like chum in the water.

The very attractive coffee barista just asked if I would like to hang out tonight and she asked for my number.

Whether she txts or not.......good confidence builder .

[gs9]

new thread
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=newpost&Board=20

[gs9]

try again
http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2643635&#Post2643635