2016 a New Year - getting out of my own fog

[Irish M]

Hi Inpain,


I don't understand my W either. I think it's because of the bond I have with my D's It was always strong and its getting stronger. W may be feeling like she doesn't have a chance or just too guilty to face them. Who knows.
I know a lot of my woman friends are scratching their heads because W loved them so so much.

When she carried them during each of the pregnancies and they would move too much I would lay my hand on W's stomach and they would stop. No more kicking. I would rub W's back every night and talk to the baby while she carried them.

When each of them were born I was the one who would wake up at night and feed them. If W was breasts feeding them I would go and get the baby and bring her in the room as W stayed in bed. Then I would change the diaper.

As they got older story time was so important. I would make up the adventures of Jeremy.

I'd sit on their beds before nighttime and listen to them tell me about their day. Comfort them if a bully at school called them a name or teased them because they had freckles.

I would volunteer at every daycare and elementary outing.

W was not neglected either. Date nights, told her I loved her and she was pretty, sexy and smart. I told her I was proud of her. I'd send her flowers at work on every occasion and even on days that were just to say I was thinking of her.

Vacations 2 a year.

The D's saw all this. It made the love in the family stronger. When we got married we got married as 4. Before me and W exchanged vows.. The D's were given each a ring to tie us as a family. 3 years ago. So the D's remember it well.

W breaking this family is her leaving. We are still tied together me and the D's.

She can't look at them with all her guilt. Her anger and manic way was projected on the D's as much as it was on me.

I'm sure she will crash. My D's have said they are done with her. I know they love her and it's their way of protecting themselves.

I promis you this. I won't let W back if my D's don't accept her. W will have to get their trust back. I will protect them from this crisis and from W. I like you had kids to not let them get hurt or emotionally damaged. This crisis won't follow them in adulthood.

Irish