A new way of thinking...

[Painter]

I want to add that I have read H's e-mails - snooped - after discovering the A by chance (twice). In one of the instances, I came across an e-mail from his L, and I read it. It was very brief, but shocking, H was trying to find a way to deny me access to the marital home when I came back from school (I was away for a couple of months). His L (who I only happened to discover he had hired after I came back, H kept a lot of secrets and lied very extensively), told him flat out no.

But the act of snooping made me nervous and almost physically ill, and it's not something I could continue doing. Since I very shortly after confronted H with what I found, it didn't give me an advantage (except of course for the proof that he had an A), and had he decided to S and D, I wouldn't have kept looking!

Ancaire, you have been honest with your H, and he will realize that what you have said to him fits with what he discovered on his own. I would take my satisfaction in that - knowing that he knows you are an honorable person.