Even today I have always felt 'intimacy' in my stomach / abdomen. Not just anticipation, but during and after. Feeling the warmth of a woman in my arms and her holding tight. It is the difference between hugging your sister and your college girlfriend.
This is what I was asking about, I have a specific reason for asking.
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You have given me lots of food for thought. I am seeing lots of cross linkages. Including real grief, not just for your twins but for the lost capacity for children. A grief most women come to terms with at menopause.
The loss of her brother, the hand holding may be a subconscious fear or protective mechanism emerging, sneaking under the radar. Hold on tight or loose out. This could be a way of confirming using physical touch.
The abuse is something she will have to handle herself, that's not something you can resolve, although by observing you may find certain things you do especially in her LL give her comfort. That will certainly increase your sense of intimacy and her sense of safety.
Some children do become sexually active early after being abused, it's a form of acting out. Not always useful but in many ways better than the alternative.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
