Here I am still

[kyrie]

Kyrie

Whatever any of us says to you, is discounted, dismissed and negated.[/qoute] -Ouch. I hear you, but am unable to reconcile opposing ideas/principles. So yeah, I'm confused - and dense.

At the core of all of our messages is Kyrie work on you.

You can't listen to, walk away from or disbelieve WH.

Close. I do listen (try...not perfect there). *can't* walk away from. Disbelieve, yeah, I do, but discerning what to disbelieve is tricky.
[quote]
You don't like the addictions or the porn or that's what you say.

You don't believe your children are affected?

- not sure why you said "or that's what you say."

I can only conclude you tolerate your current sitch and thus are able to justify staying with WH by minimising and denying.

You certainly are stuck where you are so it must be the best of all the choices.

Then I ask what do you want?

I want a holy marriage. I want to be loved (though I know that's a longer term goal). Pretty simple. I DO want to change and HAVE, but I know I have far to go still. Obviously.
There are a lot of confusing things here. I really don't know how to live "lovingly" but detached in the ways that you describe, mostly because H will not tolerate it.
So yes, I get that I need to work on me. I need specifics, esp. when certain eventual conversations happen. THAT's where I need the most help.