First time poster here Might be a bit of a long story. Mt wife told me she wanted a divorce on Christmas day. She felt very bad / guilty about it, but had made the decision and would not consider counseling / working on the marriage. She had gone through an emotional detachment of sorts before gaining the courage to tell me.
We were married 10.5 years, and have been together for ~15 years. I helped put her through nursing school, and most recently CRNA school. She passed her state board exam 12/22/15 (great timing, I know). She gave the reasons - not in love with you anymore, and just not happy in the marriage. Although I was a bit shocked, I didn't have much of an emotional or angry response. I did suspect I was not being told the "whole truth", and probably did inquire with several questions.
This did kick-start a great weight loss program for me. No sleeping or eating for the first few days. I still have to take sleeping pills now, and usually get around 5-7 hours of sleep each night. I am eating three times a day. I received DR Sunday, and read the entire book - couldn't put it down. I have never been unfaithful, never harmed in any way, never raised my voice with my wife. We have accomplished amazing things together.
Yesterday, I finally got my wife to admit that she was in love with another man. It did ironically take a lot of tightness / pain from my chest. Before he admittance, I was tormented with wandering thoughts and constant pain. Knowing the truth helped me a lot. I did turn to spiritual health and have had a great deal of support and guidance. My love for my wife has not diminished in any way, and I still have a strong hope that I will be with her again. When she did admit to the love affair, I told her that I support her, and that I want her to be happy and pursue what is in her heart. The depth of my love for her will not allow me to do anything but show her love and compassion. I do want her to be happy.
I had been doing most of the things in the book (both what I should and should not do). It has been a great help. I was so happy that I came to these forums, I was lucky enough to see some situations similar to mine, and many with successful endings. I would love the opportunity to gain wisdom / suggestions from others here, and would love to answer any questions as well.
M 43 W 45 M 10.5 T 15 S 26 D 17 (previous relationships) ILYB 12/25/15 + asks for D Confirm affair 1/10/16 W has D ready to sign, but agrees to wait for refinancing to go through (I get a house!)
Might be a bit of a long story. Mt wife told me she wanted a divorce on Christmas day. She felt very bad / guilty about it, but had made the decision and would not consider counseling / working on the marriage. She had gone through an emotional detachment of sorts before gaining the courage to tell me. 