I understand your insecurities you had in your relationship. Your story is similar to mine in a way that this is our second time through this. When it happened to me the first time and she came back it was like nothing ever happened. We moved on from it and had several great years. But I was insecure. It was deep inside me and it probably came out as jealousy. I can't go back in time and change things.
I understand more now and see so clearly but that is for us. Our MLC spouses have to do their work on them. Hopefully they will find the same answers as us.
I don't mention that my W is loco to her. I can't tell her that I figured my issues out and see clear. They don't care and it will just push them further away.
Outings with the kids are great aren't they. Keep them busy. You said it was always you and them mostly because your H was working. It's a lot easier because the don't expect him to be there. Try new things to. Change it up and a lot of pictures. These are memories for both you and them. Those sitting on the outside looking in miss everything .
Great that you did a 180 on your husband. His reaction to your interest in his work is super. It won't make him think more about your R or maybe it will. We don't know what's spinning I their minds. Do the 180 for you as well if it makes you feel good. If he notices great :-)
I am a few months ahead of you yes... I can tell you 100% I'm stronger and my thinking is clearer than Its been in years. You will get there.
There will always be ups and downs. I feel them still. Flashbacks and sadness but they are less often.
Hugs to you xx Irish
M51 XW43 (38 at bd) BD1 MAY 30 2015 BD2 JUNE 25 2015 by text moved out Aug 2 2015 left both Daughters 13 and 15 (now 18-20) Her divorce Final July 26 2016 Last time she saw her kids Aug 2 2015
