Judy, looking in the mirror and thinking wow is nice. It is superficial and does not solve any problems, except mentally you get a tiny boost. It is way more important to look at your inside and say WOWOWOWOWOW. You can get there, just forget about H for a while. You have big days coming up and once you focus on those you will find it way easier to forget about H. Then, you will look back and say WOW, I did that!
Fo, I see the same thing! Clothes for elderly or clothes for 20 somethings... I say dive into the 20's rack! the 1980's are dead, we are never gonna have style like we did back then, lol
About my dances, I am afraid if you go you will be surprised. They are not full of cool,great looking, young people. It is just a local bar and most of the people are on medicare, lol. I have so much fun because I am bound and determined to go out and have so much fun. There are one or 2 others that are obsessed with laughter, and we sort of pull in others to us like gravity. Now, I see these other people smashing out of their shells right in front of me. I dont have fun because it is fun there. It is fun there because I have fun. Does that make any sense? Because if that makes any sense, then you can easily do the same thing.
Stop by your local bar for one drink every Monday (or pick any day) You have to go in on the same day every week at first, because that way you will run into the same people. You can chat with the bar tender. They are there to chat with you, so you dont have to feel lonely. Tip the bar tender well. Like very well. He or she will take care of you, introduce you to the regulars, etc if you take care of them. Soon you will be talking to the regulars. Soon when you walk in, they will call out your name
You now have an instant group of friends who know you. Take what you get, even grumpy people can make the night fun. Have fun no matter who your group is. If you like to dance, go to a bar that has bands or DJ's.
I hear you when you say you cant go out with singles because you are not single and you cant go out with married couples because it is just weird. But ignore both of those reasons why you cant go out for now. They feel real, but they are not real. You can push past that as easy as pushing through a spider web. And lastly, no matter what is happening, SMILE, HUGELY. When you have a huge smile plastered on, everyone around you smiles. Then laughs
job, my jerkface tried to weasel out of helping. I took off on Monday because my mom had eye surgery. All went well. He was supposed to come over at noon. He texted me "I am exhausted, can I do this tomorrow?" Me "No, I took off work to get this done today."
He came over, changed a fuse and everything is working now. We have a professional (and cute) roofer coming to fix the roof. I might take off work so I can watch... I mean be there if he needs help. As for my H, I think as far as DB'ing I was spot on, but I am not really worried. I looked pretty because I was going to the bowling alley. I sang with my D because that is what we do together all the time. The house smelled great because I am a good cook. None of it was staged for jerkface and as soon as I hit the lanes I forgot all about him.
I went to a friends house last night and we had a nice, relaxing evening. I even listened to Country music (ugh) and kinda liked it (UUGGHH). My H occupied no space in my head and I was able to just enjoy myself. I love love love when I meet a kind person and the person I was with is just kind. I cant think of another, better word. My kids did not send me even one text message and I was gone from 6:00 pm to 11:00 pm. That was unbelievable and much needed.
mut, thank you as always for such kind words. Every time you post I am touched and it makes me bolder, more capable of going forward.
mahhhty I wish you were there too! I just know that if we all got together it would be amazing. No group of people in the world would not only have fun, but truly appreciate the joy of the moment like we could.
Gmum, sounds like you are down. I will pop over to your thread in a few to see what is going on
Me: 42 H: 45 M: 18 yrs T: 20 yrs D: 17 D: 15 S: 12 I kicked him out 8/21/15 I will DB until March 21st 2017, that is it!
