More and more, and less and less...

[JulieH]

You also have to remember the dynamics that children bring into a relationship. Regardless of all the premarital advice given, Many couples simply do not Have the relationship skills necessary to get through the hardships of raising young kids. I know very few if any, couples with small children that are happy. (The only happy one I actually know are in their 2nd marriages) To be honest, I think it just takes a level of commitment and the understanding that you just have to be patient while the kids are young and then things will get better. I don't think this was clearly spelled out to us or perhaps it was and we didn't listen,

I remember the pastor trying to talk to us during the premarital sessions and me thinking to myself "husband and I have been together for years. We've been through a lot together and I'm not worried". Whoa was I wrong.

I actually wish I had more experience with relationships before marrying my husband. My only real experience prior to him was a pretty dysfunctional one.

I think when you have less experience, the loss is harder as well. It almost feels like an elective death.