You're going to have to keep working on yourself during this time. The marriage flame still burns, but it's in a back corner of the room right now. You're correct that when doing GAL'ing/DB'ing, you will feel yourself getting happier without W around - you are working to fix your side of the street. And it feels great! Anything you wish you could do - something easy, something that your W might have not been interested in, but you did want to do?
Of course she thinks you're making the rules - she's realizing her perfect plan A/plan B is now gone. She'll get angry, and stay angry for a while.
My wife still went ahead and filed the D, but held back on serving me. Others on this board aren't as lucky. But the dissolving plan B got her attention, as well as me ok with the marriage burning down - I kept repeating that I'd be fine with it, but that I was just really upset about how the kids were going to be.
It wasn't about me anymore -it's not about you anymore, Chris. You're right as rain.
Yes, some faking is ok. Be authentic when she isn't around - own your emotions. Digging a hole and putting your emotions in the hole, with concrete on top isn't healthy.
My hurt is still on a shelf. It will come out, but Lord willing, when we're both strong enough to deal with it, in front of a counselor.
Chris, could you do us a favor and put your info in your signature? Always good to have a little background on your sitch - I'm here every day, and keep up with many people, so I don't want to get anyone mixed up.
M46, EXWW46 M15 T17 D20, S19, D13 M - Addiction since 1998 W EA/PA #1 2013/2014 W EA #2 June 2015... BD 1 Big D talk 9/15 BD 2 - EA/PA disc 10/30/15 Served D 1/22/16 Divorced 5/25/16 (yes, that fast!)
