I am sitting here at my desk laughing hysterically...was that a temper tantrum vent!! maybe...oh you're right the vent felt good and the laughing is helping relieve the tension built up in my body...thank you both!!
T2 what you said before about H getting ready to hit..it's scaring me because I think you're right.
I'm sorry that your H is doing this again. ((((Cathy))))
I too got a little scared by what T2 posted about your H getting ready to hit bottom but I think she's right. He has to; there's no way around it; he just needs to do it straight on and as T2 said, "sink or swim".
I mentioned to you that my dad drank. Well, after my dad passed away, my brother starting drinking as well. He DID hit bottom (hard) and he has now been sober for a year!
Quote: maybe...oh you're right the vent felt good and the laughing is helping relieve the tension built up in my body..
I could FEEL your anger and frustration; this is how I felt this morning as well. I, too, had a good laugh...I think we can get a little carried away sometimes.
It's just that when I THINK things are going along okay and then something like this happens I'm like "what happened?" There's no warning, but then again I have no idea how much H and OW talk as I haven't looked at H's cellphone bill since January.
I FELT that H was opening up a little more this week, the interactions were good, normal things, but things aren't normal are they.
Quote: It's just that when I THINK things are going along okay and then something like this happens I'm like "what happened?"
Oh Cathy, I understand. I had some of this earlier on and I would feel as if I had just fallen hard again after he went back to being an alien. I think the key is that they haven't stopped being an alien; they're just slowly (in your case anyway) starting to come back to who they used to be but the "new" H is also there.
Quote: I FELT that H was opening up a little more this week
....and the next week he'll open up a little more, and so on....it's that worm again that KAW drew for you.
You are am amazing woman! I wish we lived closer so that I could give you a great big hug. (and yes, the weather IS pretty nice here...sorry to hear about your 40 degree weather...hee...hee)
The hitting bottom hard...what exactly does that mean? I guess I'm trying to get an idea of what to anticipate. I've never seen this happen to anyone in my life.
For my brother hitting rock bottom came when he lost his job, gf, son, and temporarily his freedom. He really liked his job and had received two promotions in two years. He cried when they let him go (it was very hard for them as well). He then started drinking more. His R at the time was shaky and eventually failed and he lost his son. He ended up in jail for a few months for something he didn't do but all the circumstances were against him.
He came out and continued his behavior...lost another job; almost lost another R. He showed up at my house one day with his two year old; he was drunk and it was 11:00 pm (my H and I got into a huge fight over this). Anyway, he realized that he had put this son in danger that night (driving under the influence with a toddler---along with everything else that happened) and has not had a drink since.
He switched careers, has become more involved in church and with his family and went back to school.
Minnie's story about her brother is an excellent example of what 'hitting bottom' means....because it's the wall they finally hit when there's no one else to blame for the misery in their lives, no where else left to run to or from...when they're finally ALONE and forced to face the 'man in the mirror' and accept the fact that THEY are their only enemy and cause of all their own heartache and pain. T2
maybe...oh you're right the vent felt good and the laughing is helping relieve the tension built up in my body...thank you both!!
