dday, rebooted

[PigPen]

Fo, thanks for stopping by. As to dating, I was willing to give it a shot, but took it as a sign that it was too early when the lady backed out.

I'm honestly not looking forward to trying to find someone that meets my ideas of a partner, AND wants to be involved in the circus that is my life with 3 kids.

A week ago, I hadn't seen xw in several days and I was doing pretty good. Then, she starts showing signs that she cares and is noticing me, and I am all wrapped up in it again. Weather is crap, she has the boys, my mind is wandering.

So, today I put on a nice sweater, wore some smell good stuff and went to the ball game. I'm sure she noticed, because one of the dads commented on it. I'm normally a jeans and hoodie guy, so it's a 180 of sorts.

I think you nailed it, I started pulling back and she regained my attention. Have to go back and drop this rope again. Really don't like the feel of it!

Time dday, you got nothing but time. Love reading how you got dressed up and then went out. I'd make it a point of looking spectacular everywhere you go. I'm a jeans and t-shirt guy myself, even have some left over from high school that I used to wear! It was definitely time for an upgrade and even though I'm not dating, I now dress well for myself.

Now I think looking great when you go out should have nothing to do with your XW, and everything to do with how you present yourself to the world - as a man that takes care of himself and feels great about himself. That's attractive. That will carry into a lot more than just how your XW feels about you too.

Your sitch happened so fast, I have no idea how you've kept it together the way you have, truly something to be applauded.

I have a feeling your XW still has no idea what happened and as soon as she realizes you're going the way of strength she's going to turn her head. Don't let it sway you brother, you've got a strong path mapped out it sounds like.

Take your time dday. Look great, feel great, be in shape, eat well. Do all of the things that make you feel like you're at the top of your game. At some point your XW is going to realize she made a big mistake and then you'll be the one making the choices.

As for the dating, maybe it's not time yet. What's six more months of your life to get reacquainted with yourself. To listen to a lot of podcasts on male empowerment, leadership, and strength. Six months to get in shape for summer. To dial in your wardrobe, and your DB'ing. Six months of staying here on the boards and watching and learning. I still say this place is like a relationship PhD course.

Six months will fly by. Sure you'll have some lonely nights but you can fill them amazing speakers, authors, and close friends. It's a great investment in yourself so that when you do get out in the dating world (if some lucky lady hasn't noticed you while you're doing all of this and being a great dad), you'll be playing at an even higher level.

Stay strong dday.

PP