Elly, That was so nice, it does help. This despair will not rule over me. I believe I am adjusting to my new normal. I am detaching myself from her.
NYGal, I can't agree with this statement, "And when we're not chosen, but someone else is, it's even worse.". I think they both stink. When your spouse picks someone over you at least they are deluded and selfish in desiring something the OP has to offer. In my case, my spouse would rather have nothing, nobody in her life. So nothing is better then me. To sit in a dark room and grow old alone is better then me. I am taking this personal. How can it not be?
Dday, thank you my friend. I do despair but I know it will pass. Just like all the other flavors of $hit this experience serves me. After I am served desert at this excrement smorgasbord I will pay the bill and never look back. It is hard to not become bitter and I won't. If one is not careful becoming bitter is an easy thing to do.
Sigh, I will now exercise and sweat the despair out. Thank you my friends for your support, don't worry about me, I wear my heart on my sleeve and nothing more.
