Thanks. A little more background. We have been together most of our adult life, both in our 40s. Married 15 yrs with two young boys. About 2 yrs ago I was told (anonymously) that my H was having an affair with someone he worked with. I confronted him and he assured me nothing was going on. The "reasons" this person believed he was having an affair didn't seem to add up to me, and I have always been in charge of all finances, so I never saw anything. My H was upset I didn't believe him and gave me full access to email/phone etc. For yrs I found nothing, but he started to distance himself b/c he said he felt I would never trust him. In the summer of 2014 I got the speech and said all the wrong things. I was upset and asked so are you just going to move out? He said yes. We have been separated now for over a yr and he told me he will never come back. He said he doesn't have to tell me what he is doing/where he is going. He is adamant that he doesn't see his kids enough, but we agreed on a arrangement when he left and I am not interested in giving up any more time with them. I can't seem to stop thinking about where he is and what he is doing, although I don't ask. I try to keep busy with friends when he has the kids and with the kids when they are with me, but I'm still struggling to detach.
M: Early 40s H: late 30s 2 kids under 10 M: 15 yrs BD: 7/14 S: 10/14
