Welcome to the BB. Now, you are about to embark on one of the most difficult journeys of your life. Strap on your seat belt as the ride can get rather bumpy.
First piece of advice, remember that you should believe little of what your W does and watch her actions. Same goes for you. She doesn't want words from you right now, she wants action. And action that lasts.
It will likely be in little ways that she has complained (or not) about for years. But you have to watch for cues and respond accordingly.
The fact that she is at home puts you one step ahead of many of us. Now it is up to you and your behavior as to whether she stays there. It is yours to lose.
I would also suggest doing a brief recap of your sitch so that we know where you are coming from. How long married? Ages? Kids? etc.
This is hard. All of us here are living a variation of this - and some have it harder than others. But this BB is the great equalizer. You can come hear to vent, to think out loud about an action you want to take (before taking it in case we talk you out of it) and for support.
Make the most of the time you spend on here. Read other threads and learn from them. You will be able to find a few that are close to your own sitch and learn from them. You will find some that aren't close to yours and still learn from them.
So to recap -
1. This is hard. 2. Listen. 3. Actions speak louder than words (for both of you) 4. PATIENCE is essential. 5. Take care of you. 6. Read, read, read. 7. Act "AS IF" it will all work out. 8. Before acting or talking ask yourself "Will this get me closer to my goal?" 9. Remember you can only control you and how you react or behave - not her. 10.Oh and did I mention - PATIENCE! PATIENCE! PATIENCE!
totite
"Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative..."
