2016 a New Year - getting out of my own fog

[Irish M]

Hi Peace, I am doing great thank you :-). I Had a much better Xmas and New years than I could have ever imagined. I Hope you are doing well too.

I don't know if W wants to feel forgiven. My D's have told me they wont forgive her ever if she continues her life path. She will have to rebuild their trust again. They are teens so they will hold a grudge. As they get older they may want to reach out to her. Maybe a coffee or a lunch. Who knows.

W did say because of her actions she is paying severely the consequences and they are far worse than she could have ever expected. I actually felt sorry for her until my oldest D told me this.

"Dad its funny "her name" (since they refuse to call her mom anymore) says her consequences she is living... worse than what she expected." D then gave me that look like what ever. Then she said this " What about what we lived through the last 5 months." She ran down the list of awful things W did and said. The conditions we lived like camping until we replaced the furniture.. how it affected so many people around us, friends and family.

D finished by telling me... "we deserve better than her felling sorry for her loses."

I stood their speechless on how mature and clear D15 sees this. Like I said.. W will have to move mountains to regain the D's trust and compassion. They keep reminding me to stop feeling sorry for W. She made this mess we don't have to live in it.

Braveheart - I feel that too. clarity on her own loss and what she is missing. nothing about our feelings in this. W has a long way to go. I expect nothing from her.