do nothing or what

[roist]

Thanks Mowgli,

Maybe it is just slower.Time will tell. Either she comes around and things improve or one of us will move towards getting out. Both are better than status quo. Que sera sera. Whatever will be will be. Wrongly or rightly I believe that if M fails, destiny means for me to have a better one with someone else. Down the road I know I will have a full rewarding R.

In the meantime I am trying to focus on me. This is hard because we are still almost a couple and the parts missing are flagrant. There are so many advantages of having her still here, and I appreciate it, none of it is important without intimacy (emotional or otherwise).

Earlier I mentioned the tool to change character traits well here are my two lists. The traits I am working on changing are
1. low self esteem,
2. Indecisive/ unsure what to do
3. A pleaser putting my needs last.
4. Doubter/pessimist
5. Communication. Keep everything to myself.

The traits I am working towards are:
1. Assertive/confident
2. Decisive
3. Optimist.PMA
4. Empathize, validate,
5. emotionally open

My third list of my good traits is:
1 determination... don't give up
2 faithful
3 honest
4 willing to try
5 reliable

I have already started working on this, but if anyone has any comments or suggestion esp on stuff to help me make these changes,
ii am ready to listen.

I have a more detailed list of actions and goals to back this up. Included are some R goals. Early on I tried a lot of stuff, but we seem gradually worse at times but not hopeless. The longer limbo lasts the harder it is for me to see it turning around.But I am going to refind my beginners mind and experiment again. Again suggestions welcome.

I am also spending much less time on the couch with W. I am doing sport, working, DIY, phoning, etc. I am GAL.