New guy

[mbebos]

Update after my last post. Rather than sit and be angry about the possibility of her not calling for the free counseling visits, I sent a gentle reminder. She had not called yet, and appreciated the reminder, and not only called for the authorization, called to setup with an individual therapist. She even did a few followup calls yesterday to close out the whole process. She went a week without calling me, and in the last 24 hours has called me several times.

Now on to the other part. My DB coach and I discussed some event tickets we had purchased for the W's birthday back in September. The event is in a few weeks. The coach felt as though asking about the status of these tickets wouldn't be pursuing, and said to go ahead and ask. So I sent a message to her a couple days ago, and she finally responded. She said no, that she wasn't comfortable going just the two of us. Even though I thought I was mentally prepared for this, it absolutely destroyed me. Part of it is the fact we have been together 15 years and she is now not comfortable being alone with me, and part of it is that this is the last thing after Christmas eve that we would see each other in person. I had a massive panic attack and had to leave work. I had a horrible afternoon, but I went to my therapy appointment and had a good session. The therapist wasn't overly concerned with the W rejecting my offer and her not feeling comfortable.

Anyway, the wife offered the tickets back to me, and per the DB coach I declined and said that I wanted her to have the tickets and to have a nice time. The W called me later on last night, and again this morning, both times for really no reason. Everything she needed could have been answered in short direct text messages, but she called. I almost felt like it was to gauge my sincerity, or she couldn't believe I didn't react differently.