The book of Lou - Chapter 5

[Sotto]

Hi Lou, I recon this is all about the fact that MLCers can't really handle more than one thing at a time well. For him, his visit to the UK is a big thing and he can really only focus his energy on that or it is all too draining. Trying to keep the other ball of 'keep in touch with Lou' up in the air, may just be asking too much.

Again, I think you may be best to operate from a perspective of - take what you get when you get it and be glad. Otherwise, focus on your own stuff. I think you are falling into the trap of expecting him to operate as a committed partner and he has already said that he doesn't have that to offer just now as he really needs to get himself sorted out. I think the family trip is part of the 'sorting out.'

It is good that he was in touch at New Year and clearly you were on his mind then. It's also good that you had a good Xmas. In terms of approach, if you can manage a combination of gently withdrawing and doing your own stuff - and pleasant responding (maybe with a little initiating?) that would be ideal I think. Do remember that he is still mid-crisis here and also tackling the family visit too...

I can appreciate the disappointment though - but again I think it is just a bend in the road and one of those times to give a little space (for you both...)

Hope this helps and take care of yourself. Do you have any nice things planned just for Lou? Xx