D - Let's try something new. You have trained your brain to think of W nearly all the time. You don't do it consciously - it's just that since this started, you've given it so much thought that now, that's the first place your brain wants to go.
Let's try some cognitive therapy. Think of something that doesn't involve W, that makes you really happy. You were raised in the country? Did you have a horse you loved? A dog? Did you have something really awesome happen when you were in high school? It doesn't matter what it was - it just has to not involve W in any way. (Sadly, your boys won't work for this, they're connected to W.) A vacation? A place you went that you thought was absolutely amazing?
Find one thing and really think about it. Picture it. Fill in any fuzzy spots. This is your touchstone. Next time your thoughts drift to W, intercept the thought and replace it with your touchstone. Your thoughts are going to immediately jump back to W. You're going to immediately force them back to touchstone. Start doing this for 5 minutes a day, at first.
I'm not going to lie, it's going to be hard, really, really hard. But you've got your thoughts in a groove, which is making it really hard for you to detach and stop thinking about W. You are literally retraining your mind. You're creating a new groove, some other place your mind will want to go.
When you get this down, and it's only hard at first - it gets easier and easier, you're going to find yourself thinking about that thing that makes you happy way more often that you think of W. It works, but it takes some commitment to practice. Commitment is something I know you understand!
Heck, you could even picture a sweet automobile, say a 69 Charger? Something that brings a smile to your face. Even your new house plans will do. Just commit to practicing at least once a day, at first. You're going to find yourself doing it more and more often without even having to remind yourself to do it.
In a very short amount of time, you're going to be in here telling me how awesome I am. (I know, you do this already - but I'll be even more awesome!)
The relief you get from not having W on your mind nearly all the time? Amazing. Freeing.
(I know, you do this already - but I'll be even 